And what's profound
here is that you may not even know what is possible.
Get ready for me to clear up a WHOLE LOTTA confusion about what is
REALLY going on when it comes to meeting women, getting physical,
"serious relationships", and everything in between.
I believe that I HONESTLY have credibility and legitimacy for what you
are about to read, because I have never been one of those guys to SLAM
the idea of relationships, or to SLAM the idea of being faithful, or to
promote the worship of "bikini-strippers" above all else. At the same
time, I also FORCED myself to LEARN all about different kinds of women
and different types of social venues and of course how to ACTUALLY PICK
UP women at ANY location or venue. Everything I write here comes from
first hand experience and not just from reading someone else's writings.
So let's get started: #1. Right from the 'get-go' leading a woman into a sexual frame is
more important that you think.
The first point I want to make clear is that the power of sexual
pleasure is usually UNDERESTIMATED by most "nice guys".
It's critical to understand that women are HUMAN BEINGS, with EMOTIONS.
INCLUDING SEXUAL EMOTIONS.
And just because women don't go around TALKING PUBLICLY about it, does
not mean they don't feel the same drives you do. Once a human being is
feeling sexual and feeling GOOD, sex really can be VERY CLOSE BY.
It's actually STRANGE and BIZARRE that we as a society have made it SO
COMPLICATED.
Once you truly BELIEVE that women enjoy sex, then you stop focusing on
IRRELEVANT things like what kind of BOAT or YACHT you own, or what kind
of RESTAURANT to take her to, and you start to think about how you both
can REALLY feel good.
You start to focus on how to PROGRESS the interaction FORWARD towards
sex instead of 10,000 dates where you talk about everything under the
sun but don't even get sexual or feel sexual.
This does not mean that you don't have to ALSO build up a genuine
connection with her, but it means that without the sexual vibe, you are
operating at about .0001% of your attraction power.
#2. At the same time, make sure you don't get sucked in and fooled by
Mother Nature's tricks either.
While "nice guys" are often oblivious to the power of sexual pleasure,
it is usually OVER-RATED by jerks/creeps/players, etc.
For a lot of guys, they themselves become addicts of both validation
from women and addicts of the endorphins released from sex and in their
case, they have gotten to a point where they only get these endorphins
from sexual novelty i.e. new women every week.
In order to rationalize their addiction, they tend to have HORRIFYING
views of women, that range from all women being sluts and liars to all
women being manipulative.
They sabotage any relationships from developing by their own behaviours,
and for every woman that "cheats" on them (which is a strange term,
since they themselves are seeing many girls) they feel the need to catch
a dozen more girls to get "revalidated".
I'm going to be straight up honest about what I personally think is the
state of your typical woman who is attractive:
She is definitely put on a pedestal by most guys, so she is probably
spoiled in that way. At the same time though, this does NOT mean they
are all sluts or liars. It ONLY means that they become PICKIER about who
they wish to be with or settle down with, etc.
Also, keep in mind, that people who have HIGH-SELF ESTEEM, i.e. people
who receive positive feedback from others, often are WARMER to other
people as well, since they already feel good about themselves. So you
see, that super hot girl really might be a very warm person, she just
wants the best man to be with her, lol.
And in fact, if you understand the big picture and if you have the
skills, you will stand out very easily from the typical guy who puts
women on a pedestal or who is boring, and you will actually have a woman
become FAR MORE ATTRACTED to you than you would have had otherwise if
society were full of guys that did NOT kiss up to women and hand over
all their power to women.
#3. If you are looking for a RELATIONSHIP, you need a woman who is
the kind of person who always looks to find VALUE in her partner, and
you need to possess the same type of personality yourself.
This philosophy doesn't sit too well with the whole "Alpha-Man" hogwash
that promotes the idea of "showing her who's boss" etc, and also the
moment you are not feeling the same explosive fireworks all of a sudden
it's time to run for the hills according to these sorry dudes.
Assuming you are the "boss" is ALREADY going to ruin the dynamic
eventually. It may be exciting and challenging at first, but it will be
destructive in the end.
Instead, it's more important to understand that women are looking for a
subtle masculinity and overall leadership/initiative from men when it
comes to the "flavour" of the flirtatious and even often the
non-flirtatious interactions between men and women, all the way from
that moment when you approach her, to leading the way at first in the
conversation, to the first meet-up, to the bedroom, and even into
relationships. And all this should be laced with a good dosage of FUN.
Of course, this is a HUGE subject but I am trying to touch some of the
major points here.
But THIS is what I mean when I recommend being "The Man" as opposed to
some bossy guy, I mean the man in a MASCULINE sense, a sense of yin and
yang, bringing balance to the whole male/female thing.
#4. The truth about clubs
This one took me a long time to figure out. I used to HATE clubs. I
hated what I felt was a complete abandonment of consciousness and
sanity. I hated the fact that it seemed that the girls were all teases.
I hated the fact that so many girls dressed as if they were call girls.
It seemed like all these girls WERE what players said they were.
Well, turns out everyone was wrong. They were wrong, but so was I. The
truth is that yes, some girls really are "club whores" who usually have
low self-esteem and who rely on the club environment to feel good about
themselves and who in fact are "easy" if you are COMFORTABLE with their
model of the world, which is the ESCAPE from reality through a cycle of
sex drugs booze. This creates more problems in their life which thus
leads them usually to more sex drugs and booze.
But on the other hand, there are many "normal" girls, who are very
attractive, and who simply haven't met the right guy. Going out to a
club, especially if that club tends to attract a "more normal" crowd,
suddenly isn't such a crazy idea. Although of course, many girls don't
want to even SAY they are looking for a guy, because they want to appear
as if they are "cool" and have someone, and so most girls give the
illusion that they are JUST THERE TO PARTY WITH THEIR GIRLFRIENDS. Now,
sometimes, this truly is the case, but many times it's not.
Keep in mind though that the reason an attractive girl is single is NOT
because she doesn't have any offers, it's because in HER MIND, those
offers aren't good enough. i.e. The guy is not fun, not cool, he is a
control freak, he comes across as asexual, he is an insecure show-off,
he doesn't know how to create the right vibe, he doesn't know how to
escalate smoothly, etc.
The SECOND truth about clubs is that even if you, and even if the kind
of girl that you are interested in, would not enjoy the club atmosphere,
you may STILL BENEFIT as a guy from BECOMING COMFORTABLE in a club
setting and from EXCELLING in a club setting.
Clubs are social places. Especially the ones that are not insanely loud.
You learn what is actually cool socially and what is not. Women come out
to clubs looking their BEST, and so do the guys who know their game.
Likewise regarding the conversations, the mannerisms, you learn what is
A FUN VIBE. You start to see the big picture of how it's not any one
word or line you say, but the OVERALL DYNAMIC, the overall FEEL, which
is a combination of fun, teasing, sexuality, chilling out, enjoying the
moment and not thinking too deep until you are really in deep
conversation with a woman. And even then, you make sure that the "deep
stuff" is INTRIGUING, or BONDING, or COOL in some other way. It's not
DEEPLY BORING OR NEGATIVE!
#5. Know what you want because you can get it, usually pretty easily.
This one is really the biggest of all:
KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.
And what's PROFOUND here is that you may not even know what is POSSIBLE.
So think about that as well.
Do you want to meet a LOT of women, so that you can CHOOSE which one(s)
YOU'D like to get to know more?
Have you already dated many women, and you have the confidence that you
have the skills of attraction, but you want a quality long term
relationship?
These things actually CAN be achieved, but you have to be CONGRUENT to
your goal.
If you want an exclusive relationship, that's fine. If you have the
skills of attraction and you don't get lazy, and you make sure to keep
the connection between the two of you, and you keep your masculine
identity and make sure to keep sex passionate, and you screen for a
woman with good values, you will be in a great relationship. (hey I know
I mentioned a lot of variables, but if you wanted it to just fall into
your lap, you're dreaming.)
If you want to date multiple girls, that's fine. But don't expect to get
away with lies, or with double standards. Not too many women are going
to COMMIT themselves to a guy who won't commit back.
But some guys really don't want commitment, so it's all fine. But beware
of guys selling you snake oil who talk of "it's all about love" and who
wax on about how you can have tons of girls faithful to you while you
aren't faithful to them. It's certainly not about love, unless they mean
self-love. It's about finding girls who are willing to sell themselves
short. I mean think about it, would YOU commit to someone who didn't
commit to you? Pretty creepy to me, considering that if you love
someone, you want what's good for them too.
I've just shared some CRITICAL distinctions with you so that you can
make BETTER DECISIONS in your interactions with women in the REAL WORLD.
If you'd like to UNLEASH YOUR FULL POTENTIAL, then I recommend you
download and read my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with
Women.
And if you would like to get the FULL PICTURE, to learn EXACTLY how to
go about approaching women to take things from that very first moment
all the way to the bedroom and beyond, and even where to find the RIGHT
kinds of women for YOU, as well as how to handle and even eradicate the
kind of ridiculous “tests” that even GOOD women tend to throw your way,
then I seriously suggest you sign up for my Live Bootcamp or Workshop
program where you will “work it” in the real world. These programs are
three days and three nights of MASSIVE learning and skill growth, where
we won’t stop until YOU have achieved YOUR goals.
http://thedatingwizard.com/bootcamp/
If you haven’t yet downloaded my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets
to Success with Women, then do it IMMEDIATELY. This book is NOT like
other books, it’s about SOLVING THE ROOT CAUSE of the problem, which has
less to do with learning to be funny, and far more to do with reclaiming
your masculinity and your power. It’s about how to take ACTION with
women, from A to Z, in the way that women deep down WISH you would, but
simply can’t admit because of the anti-masculine crusade.
Michael W, better known as The Dating Wizard, is a dating and
relationship consultant for men, as well as a frequent guest on radio
and television talk shows. Michael has spent over four years studying
the specific male behaviors that trigger attraction in women. His
findings are based on both his real life observations of men who are
successful with women, as well as his research on evolutionary
psychology and its applications to sexual attraction.
To find out all about Michael, his book, and his consultation services,
check out
www.TheDatingWizard.com or call 416 630 9966.
