Attaining SKILL
in all the various areas of your game with women, requires a WILLINGNESS
to walk OUT of your old frame of reality and your old ways of doing
things.
In fact, it requires you to ROCKET out of your old reality. This means
even your old THOUGHTS must be discarded as you BLAST far away from
them.
The challenge here is that the DESIRE to EXPERIMENT with a new way of
doing things is usually the LAST thing that “nice guys” want to do.
“Nice guys” have often been HURT in the past. I know. I was one of those
guys. We don’t want to get burned again, so we try to AVOID further
BURNING by not taking chances, etc. The LAST time we took a chance, in
our minds at least, we got burned, i.e. we went up to a chick and got
shut down, or we desired some woman who mistreated us or ignored us,
etc.
Sometimes, nice guys have tried MANY TIMES in the past to have success
in terms of attracting women, and have had many burns.
So let me say right here, IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT FOR SCREWING UP IN THE
PAST, BECAUSE YOU HAD SCREWED UP ADVICE IN THE PAST!
But let me also say, THERE IS A WAY TO SUCCEED AT THIS “GAME”!
But it will NOT work unless you are willing to try a way that is VERY
different from what you THINK is the way to succeed. On this note, let
me print a fresh letter that came in:
***Letter***
Michael,
Reading your book has been a real eye opener and might well be the most
education I ever received for the cheapest price. I have been successful
in many aspects of my life, but always a dismal failure with women. I
always thought they wanted "nice" guys, and I worked hard at being one,
and I succeeded on a grand scale, for nobody I know comes close to being
as nice as I am, and I'm sure nobody has pulled their D*** as much
either.
I could never figure it out until you spelled it out in your book, even
though Leo Durocher (of baseball fame) put it best when he said, "Nice
guys finish last." I always thought I would be the exception…the nice
guy who would finish first, but it never happened, as kept myself in a
state of delusion for years.
What your book has done for me has changed my mindset when I encounter
women because most of the stuff you posit in your book I was doing the
opposite and consequently failing. I would always try to get them to
like me (kiss their ass) and I see now it appeared I was "needy" when
psychologically I'm extremely strong and the opposite of needy. I have
been "The Man" all along, but a victim of the cultural brainwashing you
so correctly point out.
I know what you say works by the experience I had in my marriage. I had
a very hot looking wife and the dynamics of the relationship were more
like you spelled out in your book and the marriage was strong, there
were other factors involved in our break up and divorce, but the thing I
realized later is that when I came toward her with more affection and
care she responded by losing interest in me and left me for some
deadbeat "broke" gigolo she met at the gym.
My marriage was the only relationship I ever had where I was doing what
you prescribed but never realized it was the key to success. Even when I
realized how when I came toward her with more affection and care she
began to lose interest, I could never draw a constructive conclusion
from it because it wasn't LOGICAL that I could start caring MORE for
someone and the result would be that they would care less.
Anyway Michael, thanks for the brain lift, just the fact that you clued
me that my failure with woman was that I wasn't being masculine is
invaluable and has changed me for the better with women starting to take
notice.
Keep sending that great newsletter.
Best Regards,
Name Withheld
****MY COMMENTS****
First of all, my respect to you for having the guts to look at things
with OBJECTIVITY and it's not easy to always do that, especially in a
situation like a serious relationship or marriage. And thanks for your
letter and the plug. I could do a whole essay just on your letter, but
for now I'd like to focus on the following point you mentioned:
“Even when I realized how when I came toward her with more affection and
care she began to lose interest, I could never draw a constructive
conclusion from it because it wasn't LOGICAL that I could start caring
MORE for someone and the result would be that they would care less.”
Exactly!
It doesn’t make SENSE.
Especially when a guy is in a SERIOUS relationship or MARRIAGE with a
woman!
She should be APPRECIATING all this SERIOUS stuff, right? After all,
she’s in a SERIOUS relationship, right?
Women want SERIOUS relationships, right?
Women make a big deal about not just having sex like that, right?
And of course the answers to these questions are YES AND NO. Women make
a big deal about serious relationships because they don’t want to appear
slutty and in fact don’t want to BE slutty. And many women, just like
many men, do want serious relationships.
BUT THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT WOMEN UNDERSTAND THEIR OWN MECHANISMS FOR
WHAT MAKES THEM FEEL ATTRACTION.
And without attraction, even the most “serious” of relationships is
usually on shaky ground.
If you want to achieve massive success in creating attraction and
leading a woman through the various stages of the interaction from first
meeting her to getting physical and beyond, you have to ABANDON your old
way of thinking, and you have to BOLDLY GO WHERE NO ORDINARY MAN HAS
GONE BEFORE. You have to make the JUMP to HYPERSPACE, you got me?
Will it feel VERY WEIRD at first?
YES!
This is GOOD!
This means you are NOT doing the same thing you did before that got you
nowhere!
You will be in a world where you do NOT give women the things you have
been TRAINED to think work.
You will be interacting with women in a way that says that YOU have
value.
And to be honest, you will actually NOT be an abusive jerk, you will
simply use a whole new language to EMOTIONALLY convey to her that you
are just slightly above her and that your value exceeds hers.
THIS IS WHAT WOMEN WANT.
You will NOT be communicating with women DIRECTLY like you might do with
babies. Instead, your body language, your tonality, your sense of humor,
your reactions and actions, your self-control, your clothing, your
BELIEFS themselves, will do the communicating for you, on a deep
emotional level within her, that makes direct communication look like a
joke.
If you are just starting out, there will be moments when you are
starting to have success, as the woman begins to respond to you in a
very powerful and attracted way, because you are FOLLOWING THE PROGRAM
and because this is CHANGING THE WAY you are coming across.
But then you will suddenly NOT BE ABLE TO BELIEVE THAT THIS IS REALLY
ALL YOU, and you will FUMBLE the ball.
I’m not saying this to discourage you. I’m saying this because it’s
realistic, and this way you won’t get all depressed.
Instead, you’ll know it is part of your progress.
For example, you’ll get the number of that gorgeous girl, or maybe
you’ll get those two super striking girls that were chatting together to
come with you for a venue change and they are flirting with you
physically and you are even IN THEIR HOUSE. And then you might suddenly
FREAK OUT internally, you will LOSE YOUR GRIP on your reality.
Old thoughts of your old identity or of the old reality will creep in
and you will feel that this is too crazy what’s going on and you will
want to spare yourself whatever emotional pain you think is SURE to
happen if you continue. For example, you think she might laugh or be
annoyed that you are not “experienced” or whatever.
You will have to learn to grow STRONGER and BLAST that hogwash out of
your mental and emotional universe.
How do I know this stuff?
Well, for one thing, it happened to me. I would have these amazing
situations, and then never pursue them, because I was sure that the
girls would laugh if they found out x, y, or z. Like that I didn’t have
a nice car, or whatever.
And then I started to just slowly say WHAT THE (*&^! And GO FOR IT
ANYWAY.
Not just “go for it” in a sense of a crapshoot, but SERIOUSLY go for it.
There is a big difference between saying “well I tried” and REALLY
GIVING IT EVERYTHING YOU GOT.
So for example, regarding the car thing, I remember when this was an
issue for me. I would meet these girls who were really responding, but
then I would not want them to find out about my car. Of course, this
issue was itself triggered by a girl from the past who tried to make me
feel inadequate about it. I let it hold me back. But then for whatever
reason something inside me eventually came to the conclusion that all
women want is to feel GOOD.
And that I knew I could make them feel much better than any car could
make them feel. And you know what?
NOTHING MATTERS ONCE YOU ARE MAKING A WOMAN FEEL AWESOME.
In fact, I remember the first time doing this, walking a very specific
girl to my car in the parking lot and she was asking what car I drove,
etc, and she was seriously mentioning how she drives a nice car, etc. I
teased her that I drove a hummer, a bmw, beamer, etc. Then we got to my
car. For about one split second, she was a bit shall we say surprised,
lol. It wasn’t a beamer, shall we say.
And you know what? I ALREADY KNEW IN MY GUT IT WASN’T AN ISSUE, because
I knew that if I had already gotten her to agree to come with me, a
total stranger, to my car, that she was obviously feeling pretty damn
good. So I just proceeded as if the car was a Rolls Royce. In other
words, I ignored the whole issue, teased her, got her laughing and
having a great time. And I have good memories of that car.
How about the excuse of being poor?
Or having a crappy apartment?
Dude, trust me, you have no idea what kind of challenges I’ve had in
that area.
Like having NO APARTMENT.
IT’S ABOUT YOUR GAME, MAN.
That’s what counts.
IS SHE FEELING IT?
Are you giving her the vibes of feeling awesome, sexually excited, fun?
Are you DIFFERENT from the wuss infestation out there?
Do you sound different?
Do you talk about different things?
Do you dress different?
Are are you the SAME as the rest of the folks in the matrix, trying to
fit in and be a clone, so that you avoid trying to do any new things?
It’s about taking her mind and her emotions OUT of the REGULAR and into
the EXTRAORDINARY.
If you can do that, man, you have got it MADE with women.
Of course, if YOU have issues with your own reality, and YOU are all
bent out of shape about things, then it’s going to be a lot more
difficult for you to do a good job making women feel great, right?
If YOUR inner game is weak, then you will be THROWN OFF by the first
thing she does that “proves” any of the negative hogwash beliefs that
might still float around in your mind.
THIS is a big reason why it’s so important to not need women’s approval
because otherwise you will be SO WEAKENED by any little thing she does
in the beginning that isn’t what you wanted. I LAUGH at any of these
things, because I know that usually women do these things because they
are ATTRACTED and are trying to show you they are not easy, and even if
they say they aren’t attracted, I laugh, don’t BELIEVE them, because I
know how things will end up and what they will be saying in a few hours
will sound very different.
And don’t forget, I love women, I don’t hate them. So all this is coming
through in a fun playful way.
If you are ready to VENTURE FORTH from the DARKNESS and into a whole
new DIMENSION with women, then I seriously suggest you download my
eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, IMMEDIATELY.
This book is POTENT. It will explain exactly how to go about meeting
women and how to trigger attraction INSTANTLY as well as how to smoothly
lead to getting physical quickly. The content of this book forms the DNA
for understanding the material in my advanced programs and services.
Michael W, better known as The Dating Wizard, is a dating and
relationship consultant for men, as well as a frequent guest on radio
and television talk shows. Michael has spent over four years studying
the specific male behaviors that trigger attraction in women. His
findings are based on both his real life observations of men who are
successful with women, as well as his research on evolutionary
psychology and its applications to sexual attraction.
To find out all about Michael, his book, and his consultation services,
check out
www.TheDatingWizard.com or call 416 630 9966.
